To some we are born as a blank slate, pure, undefiled with an innocence that cannot be tarnished by our upbringing or surrounds. But in reality, we are born ready for the distortions of the era to unfurl the patterns etched in our soul. Somewhere, somehow along the line we became distorted, some say through our own evil means.
But that’s not true, we carry in ourselves a soup of generational and world view trauma. We hold all the answers within we are our own library, our own book of life. Our pages have been filled by humanities filth dished out to us all, to be sorted sifted and cleaned for the next generation to come along and live a life that is better than ours. Trauma handed down through the familial genetic stream, childhood traumas of abandonment, loss and fear play out as if it’s just how it is. We blame the people who created these patterns of despair, they must be shunned and banished from our lives, but we all encapsulate the same traits, some seen others hidden from view for fear of shame and persecution.
Like myself some individuals are sick of the tried-and-true ways of doings things, and they would like to change their life in some way or another. Some go on retreats to have someone else provide the information, meditation and feel-good vibes. Only to come back home feel good for a while and feel depleted once the normal daily routine kicks in. Some people want change but don’t know how to go about changing things.
We need to be the change ourselves; I know it’s been said many times, but our past holds us back. We have fears, doubts and are caught in binds and ties at times of our own making. We discard the dreams, visions and happiness our soul desires. We push on as if this is the only road we follow, or this is how our life should be. But determined by who? Society who demands we play by rules, because everyone else does? Parents whose generation only did things so the neighbors wouldn’t talk? Or the education system who states that out of the box thinking is dangerous? We need to jump out of the box and see things very differently than we do now. We need to become our own heroes, no one else will be.
Our initial love of God was crushed by the denominational dogmas and chants of sinner, sinner. We turned our back on the one who loved us the most. God, Source, the universal flow that runs through us and all things. It is the gift of life that beckons us all towards the light? We spend our life wanting to be whole, we are already; but through all the conditioning and distorted versions of love we display to each other, not many recognize or display the higher aspects of these distortions.
The fault lines of destiny spin above our heads like telephone wires unable to get a good connection to source, we scramble to grab a wire that may connect us to the truth. Chances are it may only lead us so far, we try again for another wire to lead us to our path, nope not that one. We keep trying but to no avail can we find the right one, at this point we can either give up or keep trying? It’s our choice, but once we connect, things slowly become clearer. We forge on to acquire more information.
At times, our book pages may be stuck like cooking books with our favorite recipes covered in sticky sauce. We eagerly clean off the page so we can find the right ingredient, that will lead us to the right door. As we get closer to our truth the elevations of our inadequacies and fears slowly rise to the surface, to be cleansed of the distortions placed upon them. All fears and distorted ways of thinking eventually lead to love.
We have been taught that all parts of ourselves (shadows), and darkness within ourselves is bad or wrong, but like all dirty objects, they can be cleansed. Not to the point where there is no shadow, we need that to integrate into ourselves so we can display the true nature of our being.
The more we lift up and shine a light on the shadows that we fear, the more they shine in their glory, at times they are the better parts of ourselves. Rising up through the darkness, just like the beauty of a water lily to give ourselves the life we deserve.
Some of them protect us from getting hurt by feeling the pain of rejection, or to avoid being greater than we were told we were, we often hold the feeling that we are not worthy of the love and respect handed to others, whom we often see with a harem of admirers throwing out alms to keep them walking the path.
Eventually, we grow wise to these distortions as our internal moral compass is spinning in all directions, which one do we change first? Transformation in ourselves teaches us about the weaknesses we hold, we surrender to become powerless and voiceless to a power higher than ourselves. We go into a battle of our own to free the damsel or hero suffering from life’s afflictions. It feels uncomfortable but at the same time, we know we must be our own hero.
Through this we gain more understanding and empathy for those who we once didn’t flinch an eye for. We learn that we as human beings are fallible to distortions of love. We learn that there is a higher love that can wrap its emotive energy around us, so we feel safe and whole, and that emotive energy is what we have been craving for our whole lives. We purify, we transform, we feel a new love that hasn’t been felt before in this life.
We are held by God, Source the Universal Energy Being, who gave us life in the beginning, we feel a freedom to be who we were always meant to be. It’s no mean feat to transform, we persecute ourselves, we feel the pain of the betrayal of ourselves. We have forgotten how to love ourselves as we once did. Coming out at the end we have fought the biggest battle of our lives, and it was for ourselves and those around us who we hold dear.
Freedom is our reward, but the biggest reward is coming back to Source, back to ourselves.
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